This is how we function, isn’t it?
This might as well be all we are, right?
Impulses in a brain.
Our thoughts, our actions, our emotions, our fears… All on impulse.
Many things we do without really thinking about them. Some are habits, other crazy ideas we jumped into. Sometimes all turns out well, sometimes not so.
A great deal of these impulses might indeed control us beyond our will and understanding, but we are not slaves to all of them.
We can learn when to follow and when to wait and let go.
The truth is, everybody gets impulsive thoughts but not everybody acts on them.
When we sense an improper impulse, we should just evaluate it as such and let it go. We should not let ourselves get lost in it, be consumed by it.
Because it doesn’t define us. Because we need to know we are not our thoughts. We are not the emotions we want to deny. We are not the impulses we want to surpress.
Labeling ourselves with everything we think and feel is a game we don’t want to be playing. Not only is it wrong, it is also exhausting.
We do know from experience that acting on impulse doesn’t always have the best outcome. (And by acting on impulse I mean to act when we are triggered, uneasy, rather than these magical times when we are centered and take inspired action as if out of nowhere).
And when we face that not-so-good outcome, we tend to regret our actions. And this creates more troubling thoughts. And more tourturing emotion. So we end up triggered and uneasy again, and led by impulses again. We are stuck in this vicious cirlce, trying to distract ourselves, trying to run from what we need to face.
But there’s also another way. We can break the cycle.
We are used to always being on the go, to nothing and nobody waiting for no one, to life rushing past us, to always having to do. Yet this is not the only way for us to live.
We can stop for a second, acknowledge our destructive impulses, stay with them, wait a while and do nothing. (Yes, nothing nothing)
And guess what? They die out. They disappear as unexpectedly as they showed up.
We don’t deny the impulse, but we don’t act on it either.
We just observe it, as we’d watch wild horses running through the prarie.
And we might even appreciate this impulse. Its beauty and what it is trying to do for us.
We might even be grateful.